Goodbye To You
by x33 Katie
Summary: SongFic to the words of Goodbye To You by Michelle Branch and then to Sleeping With Ghosts by Placebo. Faye Thinks About Spike.
1. Goodbye To You

_Of all the things I believe in _

_I just want to get it over with _

_Tears from behind my eyes _

_But I do not cry _

_Counting the days that past me by_

His sheets didn't smell like him anymore, they smelled like me. His yellow shirt still smelt like him though. Cigarettes and gunpowder. Not necessarily the greatest smells in the universe, but god, on him, they were like heaven… Is that where he is now?

_I've been searching deep down in my soul _

_Words that I'm hearing are starting to get old _

_Looks like I'm starting all over again _

_The last three years were just pretend and I say_

I was pretending I didn't love him the whole time we lived together. And now he's gone and I've finally admitted it to myself. I wish it could have been sooner. Would he have stayed behind if I did? Of course not… he always just wanted Julia. But she's dead too now.

_Goodbye to you _

_Goodbye to everything I thought I knew _

_You were the one I love _

_The one thing that I tried to hold on to_

I clutch his shirt tightly to my chest, wishing it were really him. I didn't even get to say goodbye. I just fired my rounds into the ceiling instead.

_I still get lost in your eyes _

_And it seems like I can't live a day without you _

_Closing my eyes till you chase my thoughts away _

_To a place where I am blinded by the light but it's not right_

He had been so close to me and my heart had been beating so fast. I looked into his eyes, and I saw everything I ever wanted in life.

_Goodbye to you _

_Goodbye to everything I thought I knew_

_You were the one I loved _

_The one thing that I tried to hold on to_

He's gone, I keep trying to tell myself. He's gone… No! It can't be… This is a dream, I'll wake up soon. Don't worry. I'll walk out the door and bell peppers and beef without the beef will be sitting on the table and he'll be lying on that old couch smoking a cigarette. They never found his body…

_It hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time _

_I want what's yours and I want what's mine _

_I want you but I'm not giving in this time_

I'm nothing without him. There's no point to life without him. Why live… Why continue on when you don't have the one thing that kept you going.

_Goodbye to you _

_Goodbye to everything I thought I knew _

_You were the one I loved _

_The one thing that I tried to hold on to_

"What the hell are you doing in here?" A strained voice says at the door. It's all I dream… I clench my eyes shut. "Shrew, that's my good shirt…"

_We the stars fall and I lie awake _

_You're my shooting star_

"You stupid lunkhead…" I whispered with a smile. "We thought you were dead… I missed you."


	2. Sleeping With Ghosts

_**The sea's evaporated**_

_**Though it comes as no surprise**_

_**These clouds we're seeing**_

_**They're explosions in the sky**_

_**It seems it's written**_

_**But we can't read between the line**_

"What's Wrong?" Spike asks noticing wet tears on my face and on his shirt. He couldn't read me at all. Or was it a lie? It had to of been obvious that I was sitting in his bed crying because we thought he was dead. Stupid lunkhead.

_**Hush**_

_**It's okay**_

_**Dry your eye**_

_**Dry your eye**_

_**Soulmate dry your eye**_

_**Dry your eye**_

_**Soulmate dry your eye**_

_**Cause soulmates never die**_

He walked over and kneeled down staring me eye to eye. He moved his hand up to my face, and I flinched for a second a quick thought running through my head like he was going to slap me, but he didn't. He used his thumb to wipe my tears away.

_**This one world vision**_

_**Turns us in to compromise**_

_**What good's religion**_

_**When it's each other we despise**_

"What's this? A crying shrew? Never thought I'd see this day…" He gave a snort. How could he be so… insensitive? Here I was, wasting my valuable time crying over him and he snorts?

_**Damn the government**_

_**Damn the killing**_

_**Damn the lies**_

"You were killed…" My voice was hardly even a whisper.

"Really?" He tilted his head to the side. He looked at his hands and then tried to run it through his end table next to the bed. "I don't think I'm a ghost…"

_**Hush**_

_**It's okay**_

_**Dry your eyes**_

_**Dry your eyes**_

_**Soulmate dry your eyes**_

_**Dry your eyes**_

_**Soulmate dry your eyes**_

_**Cause soulmates never die**_

I almost laughed at that. He's not a ghost… Not a ghost… Real… So, so real.

"You're crying again…" He pointed out. I hadn't even realized it. I hated being emotional. That wasn't me at all. Not Faye Valentine, the cold hearted woman who dressed like a hooker because she wasn't afraid to show off her great body. But he… he did this to me. Weakened me… but never this bad.

_**Soulmates never die**_

_**Never die**_

_**Soulmates never die**_

_**Never die...**_

_**Soulmates never die**_

"You didn't die…" I smiled to myself.

"Yeah… can I have my bed back now?" Spike asked me standing up slowly, obviously still a little weak from his terrible injuries he seemed to have suffered. I set down his shirt I had been previously smelling on his bed and stood up. I didn't mean to, I meant to walk right past him like I had just made a mistake of going into his room instead of mine because I was drunk or something of the sort… But I didn't find myself making a rude comment to him and walking past… I found myself jumping into his arms wrapping my arms tightly around him.


End file.
